Develop Children’s Self-awareness

Four years have passed. In the beginning, Eric didn’t know much and then he began to develop his self-awareness and he influenced the behavior of the family consciously. This process was joyful, but it also challenged us as adults to think about how to guide his self-awareness in a better direction.



Sometimes he would act in a pettishly charming manner, “Mom, I can’t walk any further. Can you hold me?” Usually when I picked him up, I would ask, “Well, you’re not tired, you just want mom to hold you, right?” He would nod sheepishly.

Sometimes he would pretend he was full and not hungry in order to play with toys as soon as possible, and sometimes he would express his dissatisfaction and reluctance through tears. All these behaviors reminded us that his self-awareness had begun to form and his mind was developing.

Previously, he was a well-behaved boy and now he has learned to use language and behavior to influence our judgments.




Faced with the sensitive period that every child will experience in growth, Eric’s father and I seriously discussed how to guide him to truly express his own ideas under the premise of protecting his self-awareness. We summarized the following ideas:




1. Encourage him to speak his true thoughts or appeals, and praise him for expressing them clearly and positively;

2. When dealing with his lies that he uses to escape and shirk his responsibility, we will tell him how we feel after learning about the reasons and give him a correct demonstration to make him realize that lying cannot solve the problem;

3. Calm him down by changing the subject or showing our empathy, and then give him positive guidance about what had happened.




Every child is a born diplomat, and observing others’ speech and behavior is the instinct of children for protecting themselves. The environment we provide them is a mirror that reflects their self-awareness. Reassuring children and helping them truly express themselves will probably be a topic that never ends for us as parents