Parents seem to be worried when they discuss the defiant behavior which their kids exhibit.
As parents, it becomes very difficult to handle such situations especially when kids get disobedient and refuse to listen to their elders in a public place.
In these circumstances, the elders either feel embarrassed or irritated along with the child. But, parents please don’t panic!
You just need to understand the reason why your child behaves in such a manner and how you can handle such a situation without getting annoyed.
Defiant Behavior is also known as Oppositional Defiant Behavior. It is a childhood disorder and normally the child shows a pattern of hostile, disobedient and defiant behavior with the adults or authority figures.
When young kids display Defiant Behavior, they are angry and irritable moods as well as argumentative and vindictive behavior.
The symptoms of defiant behavior are frequent angry outbursts, refusal to follow rules, excessive arguing with adults, frequent and intense temper tantrums, aggressive tantrums and deliberate attempts to annoy others.
Defiant behavior is typical in children between the ages of 2-7 years old. Kids want what they want when they want it. Kids love to say the word ‘NO’ or show any type of frustration.
This is because they often have a hard time expressing that frustration in a ‘positive’ manner. That’s part of being a kid.
You can also expect extreme behavior like screaming and throwing things or it may be outright refusal to follow your rules or directions.
As parents, you need to remain calm and here are some things you can do to effectively manage your child with Defiant Behavior:
The first thing you can do is to control your anger when your child exhibits defiant behavior.
It is quite natural that your anger may reach heights, hence try to be as calm as possible. Just acknowledge the behavior and try to talk to your child.
You also have to try to figure out how and what to work out in order to help your child change this behavior. Avoid and keep yourself away from getting into any type of argument with your child.
Arguments and losing your temper will worsen the situation and will make your child more rebellious!
The nature of defiant behavior is to wear parents down so that they eventually give in.
As parents, you need to be strong, clear and consistent about your expectations from your child.
Do not take your child’s behavior personally. When your child doesn’t want to do or listen to you at all and it might be hard on you and would like to react to your child’s behavior in a harsh manner.
Stay as neutral and objective as possible. You need to be clear and concise and not get pulled into a power struggle. Please don’t misunderstand that your child is trying to either check your patience or doing things on purpose.
It’s really not about you, it’s about your child and what he needs to learn.
As parents sometimes you need to be great actors and actresses with your kids. The key is to keep practicing to be calm and consistent.
Parenting is not an easy job and it comes with lots of responsibilities. Your child will tend to be rebellious and may even shout at you with anger.
In such a situation, be firm and consistent as parents while setting limits for your child. Be a friend, to help your child understand the consequences of his actions with love.
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Parents sometimes forget that their kids also have the right to explain their point of view.
Parents often respond by saying; “Don’t argue with me” or “I know what’s best for you” or “ Why are you being so difficult?.” Such responses cause children to be even more defiant.
Instead of nagging and scolding, try to listen to what your child has to say. Listen to her without judging and criticizing. That is how you’ll get to understand the reason for her rebellious behavior.
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If you have a defiant child, it is true that you may feel it is impossible to do such a thing.
But the more you focus on a specific behavior, the more your child will display that behavior.
If you acknowledge her good behavior more than it will surely multiply.
Therefore, defiant behavior can tend to be tuff for parents to handle, but it is not impossible.
By being calm, consistent and at times firm with the rules as well as rewarding and appreciating good behavior can help your child learn to overcome defiant behavior!
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